FIVE THINGS THAT HAVE CHANGED RELATIONSHIPS

The feminist movement and its sequential waves have brought newfound rights, freedoms, and desires to generations of women, but have left the sexes more confused about what to do with each other. In Medieval eras it was appropriate for men to treat women as if they were delicate objects to be treasured. Today if a woman feels she is being treated as an object her accompaniment might just loose his most treasured possession. There is confusion in relationships. Men want to live up to standards of treatment that will make women comfortable and women want to be pampered without feeling like they are considered less capable. Society has reached a medium; women and feminists no longer live in the kitchen and men no longer live solely in the office. Men and women in relationships need work to establish a similar medium between demeaning chivalric behavior and the newfound liberties of women brought about by the feminist movement.

1. Forever remembered; Forever hated by some and admired by others; the forever famous and infamous, FEMINISTS.

In this essay the words feminist or feminism aren’t referring to the movements throughout history, they are referring to all and any woman. This reference comes from an old teacher who said; “Any and I mean ANY woman in society and the world who believes that she is entitled to the rights she has or believes that appreciates her rights is a feminist. It doesn’t matter whether she is out marching for the modern day feminist movement, any woman who checks a ballot at the voting booth is a feminist.” Feminism is defined as the belief in social, economic, and political equality of the sexes and the movement organized around this belief. Feminism gained recognition during the women’s suffragist movement, also known as the first wave of feminism. The second wave of feminism occurred during the 1960’s and 70’s centered on gaining social equality. During the First and Second World Wars, women were depended on; women became the bulk of the work force for goods production and manufacturing products for the war efforts. When the wars and global conflicts were resolved men returned. The work force no longer required the services of women and her place was once again in the home. With each phase of feminism women strive for different and more modern rights. The emerging third feminist wave is stirring up controversy over the goals of feminism; “Critics argue that the third wave of feminism concentrates too much on sexual liberation, to the point that it has encouraged the growth of tacky ‘raunch culture’ that cheapens and commodifies sex” (Update Feminism). From 1930 to 1960 the number of female professionals considerable dropped and while the philosophy of feminism began during the enlightenment the “…the word "feminism" ricochets like a verbal bullet across the cultural landscape. It seems to defy any single meaning for women or men but still carries within it a world of profound social and political change” (Changing the Face of Feminism). Whether the “world of change” the word feminism carries with it has positive or negative charge in people’s minds it carries a charge. Women have gained equal legal rights but the struggles of past generations tug at women’s fears. Often women are defensive and distant toward men and chivalrous actions, this causes more complicated relationships, and greater distances between the sexes.

2. “Please enjoy the ring back tone while your party is reached.” Complicated communication. Should I call? Should he? “Momma always said…”

With changes in time come changes in acceptable forms of communication. Sit at a table and observe what is said by the sexes; men and women speak in different languages and growing technology has just increased the language barrier. “Sex is what distinguishes the relation between men and women from the other systems of social division and inequality (like race or class) and gives unique depth, breadth, and power” (Mysteries of Sex, pg.3). The distinct division between men and women remains. Means of communication and introduction have changed. There are now internet dating sites, chat rooms for singles, friends sharing phone numbers, and blind dates. The days of the man calling first and the male expecting to pay are becoming fewer and further between. It is often the woman’s prerogative to make contact. In a world of text messaging and e-mails, emotion is lost from one person to another. Men and women have difficulty communicating as it is. New ‘virtual’ communication makes this barrier much harder to avoid. While a man may be willing to call he is unsure of what communication method to use. Being a creature of simplicity he may be tempted to leave the ball in the female’s court because he just doesn’t know what to do with all the options there are. As a result of simple advancement and technology one aspect of chivalry has been forever changed!

3. Men! Can’t live with them, can’t live without them. He wants to treat us one way; women don’t know what we want. How has his world changed?

At one time it was acceptable for men to treat women in a wholly chivalric manner. As time has changed the expectations of how men should treat women have also changed. Society is becoming more feminine. The man’s role in society is also changing; the growth of the feminist movement is talking power and influence away from men (Edwards). Other cultures are adopting alternative methods of sharing the once female responsibility of child rearing. Sweden was the first nation to grant both mothers and fathers access to parental leave in 1974. In Sweden granting parental leave was an attempt to give equal parental rights to parents as well as economic advantages in providing child care for working families (The Impact of Taking Parental Leave). While society was once male dominated, the feminist movement has changed the balance; in the past, women weren’t allowed to own land, and their political influence involved the opinions they shared with their husbands. The suffragist movement and actions toward equal social rights opened a door where opinions and believes of women are now being heard, and the man’s once dominate role has taken the back burner to shared rights; “Lurking underneath all this is a perception of modern men as, in essence, emasculated, passive, lacking in self-esteem and out of touch with the nature of their instincts” (Edwards). Men are working to find a place where they are able to treat women in a traditional way without offending her modern rights. No doubt, as much as society and the political system have changed for women a man’s role in both has also changed.

4. Balance and Boundaries. Mean Stares and Disrespectful Glares. Men and women may be equal in rights but they are inalienably different.

“The fewer barriers, the more muddied the waters. It never occurred to me that the more women aped men, in everything from dress to orgasms, the more we would realize how inalienable different the sexes are” (Dowd, Pg.3). Physique, communication methods and almost every aspect of life for men and women are different. Chivalry must change with society, where women may have once taken the role of a possession now men and women are sharing rights. That role is no longer valid. Women are as confused as men about how they should to be treated “I struggled with two competing images of the opposite sex: oppressor, and dream date” (Changing My Feminist Mind). Women struggle with ideas of how they should be treated by men, as men struggle with ideas of who to treat women. Should she accept that she is delicate compared to the opposite sex, or should she find a balance between being treated as delicate without losing the power she gained through the feminist movements. (She in the collective sense of the female population) It is reasonable for a man to want to hold a door for a woman, and even more reasonable for that woman to accept the gesture without being offended or feeling belittled. Women want attention. At the same time they feel a threat that in being vulnerable they will be less capable. Women are confused and struggle to not fell threatened. What’s acceptable for men to do and the man’s role in relationships is changing. Ever watch a man hold a door and get glared at? His good manners are being treating with bad manners. Chivalry isn’t about disrespect, it’s about the opposite. The days of chivalrous pigs have passed, the meanings of each contradict. A pig is just that, dirty and disgusting. Chivalry is respect and grace. Mixing feminism and chivalry is like making a complicated dessert; so many things can go wrong.

5. The rules have changed! We’re pushing them away and even more we want their attention, women can be scary enough. Don’t build up a barrier, being a feminist doesn’t mean making yourself less feminine, you have rights, don’t assume all men want to belittle you with their compassion.

Men have the unique ability to not get attached. Women are cautious when entering a relationship. Women build a barrier around themselves in an attempt to not get hurt. While trying to not be vulnerable women are likely to do the ‘random thing’ which tends to make them more vulnerable. In trying to wear pants women make it more obvious that they are nothing like men. “Ambitious young women do emotional damage to themselves by getting physical- making out to having sex- with men they are not dating or may have met for the first time” (A Disconnect on Hooking Up). Whether through experience or fear women have learned that trusting men is too difficult, experience has taught some women that men are after one thing, but judging the entire sex for the actions of the select is unreasonable. Believing that every man wants one thing is like believing that every feminist hates men, it’s untrue. Every woman wants to meet a knight in shining armor; he will whisk her off her feet, and make her a real live Cinderella. In a society where women were once considered lesser than men it is difficult to believe that actions and efforts are in her best interest. It is safe to say that women don’t expect all men to be the same. Stereotypes collide in the world of what is real in relationships, and confuse the differences between men and women with the similarities.

The world changes every day, feminism, masculinity, relationships, and chivalry are all things the modern anyone is confused about. Different ideas of how the sexes should treat each other are scattered though history. From a time when women were delicate and could ‘lose their flowers’, to a time when women were burning their bras in the name of rights, and now a time when men and women have now reached a time when they are recognizing the need for a little bit of both. Women have gained social and political rights; they can vote, own land, and even choose whom they marry or who will be the one they lose their flower to. There has to be a place and time where a new husband has the right and ability to carry a new wife through the threshold of their door. Every relationship is different, every woman has different desires and every man has different ideas of how chivalry fits into this new society. The rules are different for every relationship: you can buy my dinner if I can buy the dessert; carry me through the door if you aren’t cradling me like a baby; I’ll make dinner if you’ll help; as for the changing sexual encounters that is something to be personal for each couple. Women in relationships no longer have to right for every right. If a woman feels like fighting is the only way to gain respect something is wrong, the world isn’t like that anymore. Making a woman fight for her place is no chivalric action. Change can be fun, experiment with what your boundaries as a feminist, a woman, a knight or a man. Find where you belong and how your relationship will balance, as society does, feminism and chivalry. Each member of a relationship should belong to the other equally while belonging to themselves. Feminism and Chivalry belong in society with balance in the same way men and women exist in society.

Sources

Rosenbloom, Stephanie. “A Disconnect on Hooking Up” New York Times 1 March. 2007

Sullivan, J. Courtney. “Changing My Feminist Mind, One Man at a Time” New York Times 21 May. 2006

"Is Feminism Dead? (sidebar)." Issues & Controversies On File 26 May 2000. Issues & Controversies. Facts On File News Services. 31 Mar. 2008 .

"Update: Feminism." Issues & Controversies On File 22 Feb. 2008. Issues & Controversies. Facts On File News Services. 31 Mar. 2008 .

The changing face of feminism. By: Gabrels, Sara Terry, Christian Science Monitor, 08827729, 7/20/98, Vol. 90, Issue 164

Haas, Linda. Philip Hwang. “The Impact of Taking Parental Leave on Fathers’ Participation In Childcare And Relationships With Children: Lessons from Sweden” Community , Work & Family 11.1 (2008): 85-104.

Dowd, Maureen. Are Men Necessary? When Sexes Collide New York: G.P. Putnam’s Son, 2005

Ryan, Mary P. Mysteries of Sex: Tracing Men and Women through American History Chapel Hill: University of North Carolina Press, 2006.

Edwards, Tim. Cultures of Masculinity New York: Rutledge New York, 2006

“Feminism” http://education.yahoo.com/reference/dictionary/entry/feminism. March 31, 2008

“Feminism." Encyclopædia Britannica. 2008. Encyclopædia Britannica Online. 1 Apr. 2008 <http://search.eb.com/eb/article-216003>.

http://jade.ccccd.edu/jmiller/A_Return_to_Chivalry.htm, ‘A Return to Chivalry’, Terrence Moore. Published in “On Principal, Volume 9, number 4: August 2001. Accessed on April 8, 2008

FIVE THINGS THAT HAVE CHANGED RELATIONSHIPS: Draft

The feminist movement and its sequential waves have brought newfound rights, freedoms and desires to generations of women and have left the sexes more confused about what to do with each other. In Medieval eras it was appropriate for men to treat women as if they were delicate objects to be treasured, today if a woman feels she is being treated as an object her accompaniment might just loose his most treasured possession. There is confusion in relationships. Men want to live up to standards of treatment that will make women comfortable and women want to be pampered without feeling like they are considered less capable. Society has reached a medium; women and feminists no longer live in the kitchen and men no longer live solely in the office. Men and women in relationships need work to establish a similar medium between extreme chivalric behavior and the newfound liberties of women brought about by the feminist movement.

1. Forever remembered; Forever hated by some and admired by others; the forever famous and infamous, FEMINISTS.

Feminism is defined as the belief in social, economic and political equality of the sexes and the movement organized around this belief. Feminism gained recognition during the women’s suffragist movement, also known as the first wave of feminism. The second wave if feminism occurred during the 1960 and 70’s centered on gaining social equality. During the First and Second World Wars, women were depended on in the work force but when those global conflicts were resolved the work force no longer required the services of women and her place was once again in the home. With each phase of feminism women strive for different and more modern rights, the emerging third feminist wave is stirring up controversy over the goals of feminism; “Critics argue that the third wave of feminism concentrates too much on sexual liberation, to the point that it has encouraged the growth of tacky ‘raunch culture’ that cheapens and commodifies sex.” (Update Feminism)From 1930 to 1960 the number of female professionals considerable dropped and while the philosophy of feminism began during the enlightenment the “…the word "feminism" ricochets like a verbal bullet across the cultural landscape. It seems to defy any single meaning for women or men but still carries within it a world of profound social and political change.” (Changing the Face of Feminism) Whether the “world of change” the word feminism carries with it is positive or negative charge in people’s minds it carries a charge. Women have gained equal legal rights but the scars of past generations tug at women’s fears and often make them defensive and distant toward men and actions of chivalry which causes greater distances between the sexes.

2. “Please enjoy the ring back tone while your party is reached.” Complicated communication. Should I call? Should he? “Momma always said…”

With changes in time come changes is acceptable communication. Sit at a table and observe what is said by the sexes; men and women speak in different languages and growing technology has just increased the language barrier. “Sex is what distinguishes the relation between men and women from the other systems of social division and inequality (like race or class) and gives unique depth, breadth, and power.” (Mysteries of Sex, pg.3) The distinct division between men and women remains; the means of communication and introduction have changed. There are now internet dating sites, chat rooms for singles, friends sharing phone numbers and blind dates; the rules of the man calling first and a date paying don’t always exist. It is often the woman’s prerogative to make contact, and in the world of text messaging and e-mails emotion is lost from one mind to another. Men and women have difficulty communicating as it is, new ‘virtual’ communication makes this boundary all that harder to move around and now while a man may be willing to call he is unsure of what communication method to use and being a creature of simplicity he may be tempted to leave the ball in the females court because he just doesn’t know what to do with all the options there are.

3. Men! Can’t live with them, can’t live without them. He wants to treat us one way; women don’t know what we want. How has his world changed?

At one time it was acceptable for men to treat women in a wholly chivalric manner, as time has changed the expectations of how men should treat women have also changed. As society is becoming more feminine the man’s role in society is also changing, the growth of the feminist movement is talking power and influence away from men. (Cultures of Masculinity) Other cultures are adopting alternative methods of sharing the once female responsibility of child rearing, Sweden was the first nation to grant both mothers and fathers access to parental leave in 1974. In Sweden granting parental leave was an attempt to give equal parental rights to parents as well as economic advantages in providing child care for working families. (The Impact of Taking Parental Leave) While society was once male dominated the feminist movement has changed the balance. In the past women weren’t allowed to own land and their political influence involved the opinions they shared with their husbands. Through the suffragist movement and actions toward equal social rights the opinions and believes of women are now being heard and the man’s once dominate role has taken the back burner to shared rights; “Lurking underneath all this is a perception of modern men as, in essence, emasculated, passive, lacking in self-esteem and out of touch with the nature of their instincts.” (Cultures of Masculinity) As men work to find a place where they are able to treat women in a traditional way without offending the modern rights of women and no doubt as much as things have changed for women a man’s role is no longer what it used to be.

4. Empowered or overpowering, are women making unfair accusations towards men or will men be men? There have got to be some good guys out there, but with rights come boundaries, ‘I may be your equal but don’t treat me like one of the guys!’

“The fewer barriers, the more muddied the waters. It never occurred to me that the more women aped men, in everything from dress to orgasms, the more we would realize how inalienable different the sexes are.” (Are Men Necessary? Pg.3) Physique, communication methods and almost every aspect of life men and women are different. Chivalry must change with society, where women may have once taken the role of a possession now men and women are sharing rights and that role is no longer valid. Women are as confused as men about how they want to be treated “I struggled with two competing images of the opposite sex: oppressor, and dream date.” (Changing My Feminist Mind) Many women struggle with wondering how they feel they should be treated by men, should they accept that they are delicate compared to the opposite sex or should they allow men to treat them as delicate without losing the power they have gained through the feminist movements. It is reasonable for a man to want to hold a door for a woman and even more reasonable for that woman to accept the gesture without being offended or feeling belittled. Women want attention and at the same time they feel threatened that being vulnerable will make them less capable. Mixing feminism and chivalry is like making a complicated dessert, so many things can go wrong.

5. The rules have changed! We’re pushing them away and even more we want their attention, women can be scary enough. Don’t build up a barrier, being a feminist doesn’t mean making yourself less feminine, you have rights, don’t assume all men want to belittle you with their compassion.

Men have the unique ability to not get attached. Women want to be careful when entering into a relationship. Women build a barrier around themselves in an attempt to not get hurt. While trying to not be vulnerable women are likely to do the ‘random thing’ but that doesn’t work the same way. In trying to wear pants women just open themselves up to more pain; “Ambitious young women do emotional damage to themselves by getting physical- making out to having sex- with men they are not dating or may have met for the first time.” (A Disconnect on Hooking Up) Whether experience or fear women have learned that trusting men is too difficult, experience has taught some women that men are after one thing but judging the entire sex for the actions of the select is unreasonable. Believing that every man wants one thing is like believing that every feminist hates men, it is unreasonable and untrue. Every woman wants to meet a knight in shining armor who is willing to whisk her off her feet and puts in the time and effort to truly gain her interest, but in a society where women were once considered less beings than men it is difficult to believe that actions and efforts are in the best of interest of her rather than the desires of her male companion.

The world changes every day, feminism, masculinity, relationships and chivalry are all things the modern man and woman are confused about. Different ideas of how the sexes should treat each other are scattered though history and are mysteries. From a time when women were delicate and could ‘lose their flowers’ to men, to a time when women were burning their bras in the name of rights and now a time when men and women are recognizing the need for a little bit of both. Women have gained social and political rights, they can vote, own land and even choose who they marry or who will be the one they lose their flower to. There has to still be a place where a new husband has the right and ability to carry a new wife through the threshold of their door. Every relationship is different, every woman has different desires and every man has different ideas of how chivalry should and does fit into this new society. The rules are different for every relationship; you can buy my dinner if I can buy the dessert, carry me through the door if you aren’t cradling me like a baby, I’ll make dinner if you’ll help me, as for the changing sexual encounters that is something to be personal for each couple. Being the woman in a relationship doesn’t mean you should have to fight for every right, and if you feel like fighting is the only way to get respect than maybe you are more advanced than your partner, as much as you hate it… kick that pig to the curb, making you fight for your place is no chivalric action. Change can be fun, experiment with what your boundaries as a feminist and women are and find where you and your man belong. You should be as much his as he becomes yours.

Sources

Rosenbloom, Stephanie. “A Disconnect on Hooking Up” New York Times 1 March. 2007

Sullivan, J. Courtney. “Changing My Feminist Mind, One Man at a Time” New York Times 21 May. 2006

"Is Feminism Dead? (sidebar)." Issues & Controversies On File 26 May 2000. Issues & Controversies. Facts On File News Services. 31 Mar. 2008 .

"Update: Feminism." Issues & Controversies On File 22 Feb. 2008. Issues & Controversies. Facts On File News Services. 31 Mar. 2008 .

The changing face of feminism. By: Gabrels, Sara Terry, Christian Science Monitor, 08827729, 7/20/98, Vol. 90, Issue 164

Haas, Linda. Philip Hwang. “The Impact of Taking Parental Leave on Fathers’ Participation In Childcare And Relationships With Children: Lessons from Sweden” Community , Work & Family 11.1 (2008): 85-104.

Are Men Necessary? When Sexes Collide

Mysteries of Sex: Tracing Men and Women through American History

Cultures of Masculinity

“Feminism” http://education.yahoo.com/reference/dictionary/entry/feminism. March 31, 2008

“Feminism." Encyclopædia Britannica. 2008. Encyclopædia Britannica Online. 1 Apr. 2008 <http://search.eb.com/eb/article-216003>.

http://jade.ccccd.edu/jmiller/A_Return_to_Chivalry.htm, ‘A Return to Chivalry’, Terrence Moore. Published in “On Principal, Volume 9, number 4: August 2001. Accessed on April 8, 2008

Mediation Brief; Revision

Men and women in a relationship need to establish a happy medium between extreme chivalric behavior and the newfound liberties of women brought about by the Feminist movement.

· The Feminist movement drastically changed western culture by giving women more rights and allowing them to choose their own paths in life.

o Women are no longer confined to the kitchen.

o Women now have rights equal to those of men.

· Technology has also changed women's roles in society, especially involving communications

o Cell phones, internet dating.

o With such devices, who is supposed to take the initiative--the man or the woman?

· Along with the woman's, a man’s place in a relationship has changed; however, this does not mean that he is no longer allowed to pamper the lady he is with. It simply means that men must be more conscious of their chivalric deeds and be sure not to offend the woman through his loving actions.

o Women are scared of losing the respect they have earned through the Feminist movement.

o Extreme Feminist behavior, though, can confuse men or make them feel unneeded; it also disrupts the balance men and women are supposed to have in a relationship.

· Chivalry should never result in a man being regarded as a "chivalric pig," in which he takes advantage of the woman's desire to be cared for.

o Even though women are now empowered and equal to men, they still wish to be shown affection and treated kindly and in a loving way.

o Men should not take advantage of these womanly desires in the name of chivalry.

· 5. Women need to be able to accept certain chivalric behaviors without feeling threatened that they will be less-respected or thought of as inferior.

o In establishing their rights, women have become defensive, feeling that they should protect those rights, along with protecting themselves.

o Chivalry is no longer accepted as a set of strict guidelines that males need to follow; rather, it has evolved through the centuries to become a suggested set of behaviors for treating others with respect.

§ Chivalry is not man lording himself over woman; it is a gentleman showing how much he respects and cares for the lady he is with.

§ Many feminists have taken their well-earned equality to heart and have abused it; they then wonder why no man wants to treat them well.

Mediation Breif

Men and women in a relationship need to establish a happy medium between extreme chivalric behavior and the new found liberties of women brought about by the feministic movement.

1. The feminist movement drastically changed western culture by giving women more rights and allowed them to choose their own paths in life.

2. Women need to be able to accept chivalry without feeling threatened that they will be less respected or thought of as inferior.

a. In establishing their rights women have become defensive both towards defending those rights and themselves.

3. A man’s place in a relationship has changed but this doesn’t mean that he is no longer allowed to pamper the woman he is with; it means that men need to be more conscious of their chivalric actions and work to not offend the women.

a. Women are scared of losing the respect they have earned by the feminist movement.

Feminism and How Chivlary Falls Into Place

It seems to me that the idea of what ‘chivalry’ is; is misunderstood. Some sources say it is a code of honor and ethics followed by knights during Medieval Times. Other sources say it is and guide for how men should treat women in general or the particular woman they are in a relationship with. Some simply believe it is a dead ideal.

It seems appropriate to say that acting in a chivalrous manner is a tradition, but with time all traditions change. When people think of chivalry they all have clear ideas of what chivalry is and what it isn’t. Some believe it still exists while others believe it is a dead tradition. Chivalry doesn’t seem like the right word to use anymore. While it is important to encourage both sexual restraints and service of men on behalf of women it is also reasonable to have similar restraints toward men. There are many possible causes for the ‘death’ of the chivalrous manner, while women fought for their rights there was also a sexual revolution. Chivalry whether it is dead or alive isn’t what it was once thought to be, because women are so concerned with their rights they also don’t hold men to standards necessary for men to treat them in a gentlemanly manner because they are scared of how the way men treat them will affect the way they are perceived or respected.

The matter isn’t that women don’t want to be whisked away or carried through the threshold of their new door with their new husband. Women don’t want this treatment thought of as lesser or disrespected for being treated that they are special. Chivalry has become a mind frame and a thought rather than a way of acting in a relationship. There should be give and take in a relationship and both members should respect the other equally. If carrying his new wife over the threshold of their door is a man’s way of showing compassion and respect then women should have the opportunity to display their affections in a similar manner without conforming to the stereotype of what a wife is and should do.

Chivalry shouldn’t be considered a tradition of how a man should treat a woman, but rather a give and take form of respect for yourself and your partner or yourself and the people around you.

Women can often feel like they are in an uncomfortable position when a man shows them respect. Women enjoy attention but they often feel uncomfortable by the attention they are receiving. There is a general scare factor between men and women, because women know that most men have the physical ability to overpower them. While holding a door is not meant to be threatening or even meant to be an innuendo it can often make women feel uncomfortable. There are distinct sexual differences between men and women codes of respect need to be gender specific rather than gender neutral because of the differences between men and women Feminism isn’t about denying differences it is about gaining rights and respect for what women are and the place they should hold in society.

We no longer live in a time of knights and maidens, chivalry has changed and so has feminism, women demand respect and rights and men feel threatened to offend women or come across as dominate when women fought so hard to gain the rights we now enjoy. There should be a code of mutual respect between men and women and respect should be mutual and something shared between the sexes.

Sources

http://jade.ccccd.edu/jmiller/A_Return_to_Chivalry.htm, ‘A Return to Chivalry’, Terrence Moore. Published in “On Principal, Volume 9, number 4: August 2001. Accessed on April 8, 2008

Feminism and Development: The Brief

Feminism is defined as the belief in social, economic, and political equality of the sexes and the movement organized around this belief. While the feminist movement gained recognition with the women’s suffragist movement and again with movements in the 1960 and 70’s it has actually been a widely used method of expression and independence for women since the fifteenth century. Throughout history the feminist movement has often been associated with women’s suffragist movement in America but the philosophy of feminism actually originated in Europe. Today the feminist movement causes confusion in relationships and in the home, roles are being reversed and while some try to hold onto the old way to doing things they need to realize that women have gained their own rights and are fully capable of standing on their own two feet without the assistance of their ‘gentlemen’ accompaniment.

Other than something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue a well know wedding tradition is for the groom to carry ‘his’ new bride over the threshold of their residence, while it is important to respect tradition women have forever been treated like they are incapable of standing on their own two feet or making it through the threshold of that door on their own. Historically women have been confined to the home and the domestic life while to public life of socialization, land owning and politics was reserved for men. Modern society has come a long way since the days of being seen and not heard and yet women fight for positions in the workforce and other areas of life away from the domestic sector.

Women recognized the need for change as far back as the fifteenth century. Years of searching and thinking with no organized method accomplished nothing. By the enlightenment feminist had developed a clear philosophy of both what rights they wanted to gain and how to go about gaining those rights. With the dawning of the western abolition movement women across the west began to also move for rights of their own. Women began to apply the American concepts of freedom and equality to their situations; after the Civil War many suffragist believed that the Fifteenth Amendment would include their right to vote rather than prohibit discrimination at the polls simply on the basis of race. After this unexpected disappointment the women’s suffragist took root and fought to for the right to vote and express their voice in society. After the passing of the Nineteenth Amendment and gaining political equality the early feminist movement lost much of its steam. Women were no longer bonded by one common goal and broke down into smaller groups and organizations that advocated more for the general civic and social equality of all rather than the needs of women as a whole.

The general goal of the first feminist movement was not strict equality but rather the development and an increase of laws and political factors that directly benefited women. After women gained the right to vote many questioned the goals of feminism, was it a movement for equality or simply a movement to respond to the greater needs of women? Whether or not the question was truly answered the dawn of international turmoil opened the flood gates of equality. The World Wars opened many doors and opportunities for women and put them in positions equal to those of men; while women proved themselves capable, when the war was over they were fazed out of positions and the doors of opportunity were once again closed. From 1930 to 1960 the number of women professionals significantly dropped.

During the 1960 and 70’s the second wave of feminism took hold. The movement was a rift, seemingly breaking apart the suburban life represented in pop culture at the time. What many fail to realize is that this second wave of feminism did not develop out of a total shift in the way women were thinking and what they believed they deserved. Many who represented feminism during this movement sought change through the encouragement of their ‘bored out of her skull’ college educated, housewife mother. While the first wave of feminism was sparked by the abolition movement, the second wave closely followed the Civil Rights movement. While groups were fighting to resolve racial difference and find equality women took a stand against the inequality they had been facing since the end of the war period. During the second wave of feminism three groups emerged; Anarcho-Feminists, Liberal Feminist, and Cultural or Difference Feminist. When people picture a feminist and see a women burning her bra or fighting through a crowd they are relating feminists with the Anarcho- Feminists who believed that equality could not be gained without breaking down the establishments and perceived roles of the family, mother and father. Liberal feminists had a more pragmatic approach to their difficulties, rather than taking a stand against the government, liberal feminists believed their problems could be solved by working with the government. Women who believed in accepting their place and the way society treated them are known as Cultural Feminists, who believe in celebrating the differences of womanhood rather than attempting to critique or attempting to enter the ‘male’ spheres of society.

Through time and even in the same time period the feminist movement has changed within itself and changed the structure of society. There are many who highly respect the feminist movement and many who condemn the movement, but both groups are not blinded enough by their thoughts to ignore the accomplishments. While men and women coexist in society by many they are still not considered equals, whether she is supporting her family singlehandedly or running a Fortune 500 Company some will still consider women as part of a lesser group. Women must push some compassion and attention away to maintain position. When people depend on those around them they are often considered lesser. While the women’s place has traditionally been to be seen and not hear and to care for domestic aspects of life that is no longer her place, if she relies too heavily on the men around her, her accomplishments are not seen as those of an equal but rather those of a women. Whether tradition or romanticism begs a man to carry his new wife across the threshold he must realize that the gesture is no longer needed, we are capable and able to not only stand on our own feet but also walk through the door as an equal and a capable member of society.

SOURCES

1. “Feminism” http://education.yahoo.com/reference/dictionary/entry/feminism. March 31, 2008

2. “Feminism." Encyclopædia Britannica. 2008. Encyclopædia Britannica Online. 1 Apr. 2008 <http://search.eb.com/eb/article-216003>.